As we are already a quarter of the way into 2020, I felt it was probably about time I finally posted this years “goals”! Or rather areas for self-improvement I am trying to improve on.
In addition to making a list of travel goals for the year, this year I have also highlighted some specific areas I want to try and improve on too. They are not particularly goals that can be ticked off (I always have things I am working on so haven’t done that this year) but rather these are just areas in my life that I want to improve on over the next 12 months.
I have been very specific in saying things I am “trying” to improve on. Several of my ongoing goals can be ticked off; like completing my counselling course/assignments or certain books I want to read, saving goals and places to go or home improvements. These things however are areas I simply want to become better in because at times I am not that great at it.
I know they are more long term plans of action and so will be ongoing but, drawing attention to them in a post like this is simply highlighting that I am aware and attempting to do better since I became aware of things I could be doing better with. I plan on putting more effort into these areas moving forward this year, but at the same time, I might not always accomplish it that day or week and that’s fine.
I am also aware that it will take time too and I am okay with that – because I am trying my best with them each day/week/month along with whatever life is throwing me in that moment. So in no particular order, here are a few things I scribbled down at the end of 2019 / beginning of 2020 that encompass the things I am trying to improve on in 2020!
1. Beautifying my Home!
On Wednesday I finally had a full day off and I spent it cleaning/de-cluttering our home – it was awesome! Despite having this on my list, it has been hard some weeks with kids, working and studying to find a day where I can do these things. Even so, I am keen this year to improve my ability to keep on top of the tat/clutter and spend time deep cleaning it more often and more efficiently.
Day to day I find that I often only have time to do the basic laundry, dusting, mopping and hoovering etc. But for the last few months I have had an app that has changed that up for me (and that I will share more about in another post). It has helped me to balance everything on regular rotation and prioritise the bigger/deep clean jobs more regularly – I love it!
So this year I really want my home to be a little more organised, a bit cleaner and, I want to make time to carry out little decor and home improvement projects too that will just lift it slightly. At the top of that list now is probably to clean or replace our lounge carpet, paint the staircase and landing walls and, spruce up our bathroom.
2. Make my body stronger – Physically and emotionally
I like my body and appreciate it a lot more that I ever have in my life. But since watching “Fighting with my Family”, I felt inspired to want to make it more physically and emotionally stronger. I want to be able to endure longer walks, increase my muscle strength since having 4 babies and I also want to be able to keep up with the kids going forward.
Emotionally I do not see it as weak to feel things, but I do want to be more resilient in carrying problems I will hear in the counselling room and how these could potentially affect my personal life. Therefore I want to try to, through my own counselling and supervision and self-care, make myself emotionally stronger.
I haven’t started the physical aspect of this yet – I find January a good month for fresh starts and new prospects, but a difficult one to get motivated with cold an dull days. I plan on trying to start a regular exercise class and do more than I am to strengthen my body physically; perhaps jogging or getting on a bike more!
3. Read more – Scroll less
Not only will this increase my intellectual capacity but also increase my social interactions with those who are here in person and in the moment too. There have been too many times I think “oh, I was a little disconnected there” because I prioritised my phone and, I really don’t like it.
Over the years I have also always set a number of books I want to read by the end of the year and if I have a busy month it isn’t always realistic and then I start to feel like I am failing in some way (so not true!). My efforts this year however will be focused on trying to read at least a chapter of something before bed instead of being on my phone. I feel replacing this pattern will help my mind, provide more time to connect with my husband and kids, and also has the added bonus of increasing the books I read.
Of course some nights if I am cleaning and making pack ups, out for various things or working on assignments, it may not happen but I want to try to read more and scroll less; particularly at night!
Other ways I have thought about being better at it is trying to put my phone away when with the kids and my friends and, also to have days where I just don’t go on it. I find it at times annoying, not good for my mind and just wasting time, yet I do it! We all sit there on them and I want to try this year to scroll less, read more and talk more to others. Those things have far more value to me and I want to reflect that in my behaviour.
I love hanging out with Nathan and we have a lot of fun on dates. We are good at having regular time for a date night most weeks, but have also got into a rut (or maybe routine) of just watching a film at home with food most weekends. We really enjoy it but we have also highlighted that we should make more effort and try to mix it up a bit – have new experiences and more fun together trying different things through dates.
So, in 2020, once a month we are going to try harder to do something different and out of the home. This of course hangs a lot on finances and being able to get babysitters too, but the goal is there to improve the variation and quality of our dates. And, even if from our trying to we only get 6 or 7 months this year – it will certainly be an improvement on last years efforts!
Some of our ideas include the theatre, a Jazz bar, try new food and Trampolining or inflatanation type of thing. I would love to hear some of your married date ideas too!
5. Play More
My kids are growing up so fast and I really want to play more with them.
I want to put my phone down and live in the moment with them.
I want to try to have more games nights together, get down on the floor, be a bit silly, dance and go places where we can have fun as opposed to using them as opportunities to sit back for a break.
I want to say yes more to new adventures and I want to go rock climbing with them, swimming more, hide and seek and imaginative playing etc.
We are good at having family days out, but I want to step it up as a mama this year and I want to play more with my kids and appreciate these brief years we have to let go, have some madness and say yes!
6. Self care & Maintenance
My friend inspired me on this a few weeks ago and so I have adopted it onto my list. I want to make more time to pursue things that make me chilled and happy and, I want to try to maintain myself better by taking more time to do my hair and think about what I wear etc. Or some weeks, just shower more!!
I have this on my list, as it not only helps my well being and self confidence, but generally it makes me happy as I feel good and it encompasses my interests of fashion, hair and make up too.
Self care and making time for me also helps me with my efforts to be emotionally stronger and a better mother too.
The new year is a time always flooded with the expectation to be more, do more and lose more than we were and did in the previous year. But I am not buying into it and feeling the pressure to make goals unnecessarily.
Whilst I find the new year to be a wonderful opportunity to have a fresh start and write 12 new chapters of life, I also have things I am always working on throughout the year and little goals along the way and so I don’t want to feel pressure each new year to have to add more to that last just because it is a new year or because that is everyone elses goal. This is my life and I am very aware of how I can be a better person, mama and wife and with that, I have been thoughtful (but also cautious) with these things to not label them as goals, but rather just things I would like to be better at doing by the end of the year and going forward in life – and that is enough. I am trying and I am putting in more effort when I am able to and that is better than not.
What are you trying to do better at?
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