As we left Cornwall last week Naths Mum handed me a bag with this beautiful hand stitched blanket. I LOVE IT!!!! If you wonder why the crazy colours? its what I chose 🙂 (I know I have taste haha) I love bright colours and from finding out we were expecting I mentioned how i’d love an orange and turquoise blanket for the baby
I absolutely love it, its so cool – not just because its what I had hoped for but for what it represents. Made from the love of a grandmother for her to be wrapped in love for the days she is here and then for it to be a comfort to us when she is called back!
Another Blanket of love is the one that my own mother is knitting; its white and will be used to wrap her in when she is laid to rest. Both specially and specifically made by Poppy’s grandma’s that she can be wrapped in love in life and death. I know both have found them emotional to make but what it means to us all has helped them continue…
The last few weeks we have been wrapped by others in blankets of love through notes, treats, prayer, packages – the list goes on. Each one brings us strength to keep going and hope for great things. We are very blessed to have people all over the world hoping with us and spreading this love over our family.
I am learning so much about hope from this journey and I have seen it manifest itself differently throughout the family and our friends. Obviously hope can be quite superficial as with a blanket colour choice or maybe whats for dinner, but im talking about reall , deep hope from the heart that you truly have confidence that the efforts of everyone will be for a purpose and joy will come to us all, even if for a short while.
There have been the occasional days I have felt helpless and as a result hopeless too. Everything around me at times seemed so bleak and that there really wasn’t a lot to hope for – things are what they are and cannot be changed. But one thing I have learnt about hope is that yes you see things as they are but from a quote by Joyce Meyer you can also: “Be confident that something better is coming”.
Yesterday Nathan and I read over all of the notes again from Poppys scans and suddenly we saw some light. After speaking with other parents that have already gone through this with children with trisomy 18 and the same heart defect and yet who had had their children live several weeks I had wondered if there were any chance we could have our daughter for a few weeks instead of hrs or days as Drs have told us – I prayed SOOOO hard for this to be the case. What we found has made me believe that we might just have that blessing. The one major thing preventing it was that her heart is known to be “duct dependent” and without surgery or drugs this would close within a few days and she would pass away. I spoke to a cardiac nurse today at LGI and she confirmed what we hope
– we remembered that from 20-28weeks the narrowing of the Aorta had begin to self correct and blood was flowing through, if this continues and is open sufficiently that when the duct closes blood can still flow the yes she would live longer! Yes her life would still be limited and heart poorly but she would be able to live for a while longer. HOW EXCITING!
I also have a genetics appointment, a trisomy 18 baby at 37 weeks with a strong heartbeat, another scan this week and well a lot to be grateful for and a lot to be hopeful about.
I have felt a lot of peace through prayer the last few weeks that what will happen is in God’s hands and that it will all be okay. I know things will reach a point of unbearable pain but we as a family have been given strength as I say from the actions of others with their blankets of love! Please continue to reach out to others you see suffering, you wrap them up for a little while and bring hope and comfort on dark days. Its because of others in our lives; family, friends and strangers that I can be happy and have a smile on my face at one of the hardest points of life! THANK YOU