The Ordinary Moments 36/52 – Daily Blessings

A few days ago I met up with an old friend and spoke of where I am at.  It was hard to talk about how close everything is getting, things I still haven’t been able to deal with and generally hard stuff about life right now and leading up to the 1 year Anniversary – She said to me “I’ll always remember you told me to look for a joyful or blessed moment every day” and it got me thinking A LOT (as she isn’t the only one to have reminded me of this recently).

As I reflected on this something that was said to me (but came from me) I remembered that often we get soooo bombarded with the hard times in life we fail sometimes to spot the joy or the little blessings sent to us to make it bearable. We don’t always see that there is some sunlight through the clouds or that we have been given things or people to aid us, or been given the tools to get through the rough spots and things that will prevent us becoming bitter because they remind us there is good in the world and good people in life. I realise, especially with some people in my life they are not given to us to “get it”, but rather give us normality and refuge from the awful reality we face. They give us a lot of fun and laughter and keep life happy.
InstagramCapture_5f87c4b4-b355-491f-988f-7af9ed02b2faFullSizeRender(2)Since we found out that Poppy wouldn’t live very long (if at all after birth) and found out that she had Edwards Syndrome, people near and far have sent and done things for us that have blown us away an yet have made each day manageable and shown us that we are not forgotten. They have given us their time, comforting words, friendship and practical things to bring a little sunshine into our life that particular day.

As I approach the anniversary of loosing Poppy and as things start to feel really hard again I have seen an increase of these little blessings in my life from the people we know. It seems we have been able to enjoy extra fun times with our families and laugh and play so hard with them all. We have received food, treats, cards and packages, and so this weeks Ordinary moments is really just a list of everything over the last year that has made every day of living with Infant loss more bearable. It is a great big “THANK YOU” to people near and far that have done special things (big and small) to support and love us and to make our Ordinary daily struggles into Ordinary moments of gratitude, peace and hope.

I love that it is an Ordinary moment for us to have these little specks of happiness given to us and so with out further a do I wish to share with you what a year of thoughtfulness and Ordinary moments of daily blessings looks like (in no particular order), and perhaps it will inspire you to pay it forward and be the light in someone else’s storm:

  1. Biscuits left on our doorstep
  2. Baked Goods
  3. Treat packages
  4. Dinner made for us 
  5. …and brought round for to freeze for the hard days
  6. …and send for us to make in a big box incase we couldnt shop
  7. filling the fridge (more than once)
  8. Filling our cupboards with healthy things
  9. Dinner Bought for us from M&S and take out 
  10. Restaurant Vouchers 
  11. Flowers done for the funeral- FREE
  12. Photography at birth – FREE
  13. Coffin made – FREE
  14. Assistance with general burial stuff – FREE
  15. Cinema Vouchers
  16. Poppy related gifts – Including jewellery, scarf, hankie, willow tree ornaments, brooches, clothing
  17. Emails with helpful reading material and messages of LOVE 
  18. Texts checking in/sharing the love
  19. House cleaned (more than once)
  20. Laundry done
  21. Childcare – for over night / several nights and only a few hours and Every SANDS meeting
  22. A cross stitch cushion
  23. 2 different cross stitch pictures
  24. A scrap booked Family Tree 
  25. Paper cutting framed quote
  26. Lovely Stationary left on the doorstep 
  27. Visits from lots of caring people at home
  28. Visits from People at hospital and the hospice to see her and us 
  29. Thoughtful Quotes sent on FB/text/Pinterest and email 
  30. Letters
  31. Cards 
  32. People coming over at the drop of a hat to talk and listen and cry
  33. Friends giving A LOT of time to talk and listen generally
  34. Flowers
  35. Chocolates 
  36. Breakfast brought over to start the day off right
  37. LOOOOOONNNNGGGGG phone calls
  38. New Scarves for me
  39. Books bought about loss 
  40. Lunch dates – often paid for
  41. A long walk and lunch out
  42. A lift to my 1st SANDS
  43. Lifts to go out with the Kids when Naths had the car
  44. Outdoor walks and talks 
  45. Asking how we are with a desire to really know 
  46. Letting me pop over to sit and talk, watch my kids whilst I rest and make us food
  47. Supporting my endeavours
  48. Letting us hang and the hospice for some peace and refuge
  49. Free bereavement counselling 
  50. Family fun to escape
  51. Dancing and singing in the car to laugh together 
  52. More treats brought over 
  53. Knitted/Crocheted Blankets
  54. Extended Compassionate Leave 
  55. Hugs 
  56. A day out – lots of days out 
  57. New Pjs because i’d probs be spending a lot of time in them
  58. Not being mad for being let down because it was too hard
  59. Massages
  60. Nails/pamper days 
  61. Spa days 
  62. Craft box for the kids to make indoor days more bearable
  63. Lovely toiletries
  64. Starbucks voucher 
  65. Boots Voucher 
  66. Burial dress sewn for poppy
  67. Inviting us for dinner and play dates
  68. Facebook chats to ask how things are 
  69. Not avoiding me at a play group 
  70. Talking at playgroup about it at length 
  71. Sharing blogs and successes to raise awareness with me 
  72. Helping me start a blog and understand social media to give me a voice, focus and share the story 
  73. Releasing chinese lanterns with us on a dark windy christmas day night, so that we could include Poppy at Christmas
  74. Having Pictures in your home to show she is not forgotten in the family
  75. Making Poppies cake – FREE 
  76. Sending general lovely things for the kids to play with and dress up in 
  77. Sending a list of FREE places that will be joyful to go together 
  78. Buying flowers to put on Poppies grave
  79. Sitting and helping me with the kids 
  80. Disciplining the kids when we are out because I cannot even function
  81. Helping to remind me of everything that needs preparing for school, because I cannot remember (because my mind isn’t functioning)
  82. Giving me opportunities to build up my confidence again 
  83. understanding and not judging when the day is hard 
  84. Helping us to have things to laugh about 
  85. Making Memory Boxes with the kids
  86. Travelling miles for the funeral 
  87. A poppy Painting and love note 
  88. Always asking, Always remembering, Not being afraid 

I might rant and talk of how hard this is and that’s because it is and because I need to share that side with the world and help them to see what this journey is like. But, I am also very aware and very grateful for all everyone has done and tries to do… THANK YOU for being our special Ordinary moments, because of you our life can still be fun, full and joyful.

Here are some of the previously mentioned Ordinary moments from this last week where we again have been blessed to see the thoughtfulness and kindness of others to help us get through and the amazing fun our families bring!
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6 Comments

  1. September 7, 2015 / 9:31 pm

    Beautiful post and your little specks of happiness shows what a great network you have x #OrdinaryMoments

  2. September 8, 2015 / 1:10 pm

    Such a beautiful post and touching post its so nice to see that you are surrounded by so many wonderful people!xx

  3. September 8, 2015 / 7:07 pm

    a lovely list of things to appreciate and be thankful for. Something I need to actually write down more regularly! x

  4. September 8, 2015 / 7:31 pm

    Oh Mary such a beautiful and emotional post! Such a long list of wonderful things to be thankful for, it sounds like you are so loved, and that support must be so invaluable. I’m thinking of you xx

  5. mummydaddyme
    September 13, 2015 / 8:20 am

    What a beautiful post Mary and I am sorry it has taken me till now to get round to reading it, it’s been a busy week here. You sound like you are so loved and having a wonderful wonderful network of people around you. These little things must mean so much. Thank you for sharing them with us. x

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