I previously blogged about my goal of 30 goals before 30, in order to enhance life and enjoy the last year of my 20’s! Well here I am hrs away from being 30 and nothing really went to plan how I had hoped! I am beginning to think that perhaps goals and planning ahead isn’t how I am supposed to live my life. If theres one thing I am learning from loosing Poppy it is to live more in the moment and enjoy what life gives us that day, each day will then mold me and take me where I am destined…happiness (eventually)!
I started this week off feeling pretty naff, the car was broken (again), I was overwhelmed with life and I felt far from excited about my birthday approaching. Not because of turning 30, I have accepted that, but rather because I wanted to have fun in my last week of my 20’s and didn’t know how I would accomplish that with so much grief I was carrying. As I looked over the sea at Brid it came to me – do as many joyful things as you can and go out with a bang!!! The more I thought about it the more excited I became, I can do all of the things I love and though life is far from joyful I can have some joyful moments, my sister instantly helped me put it into action and off we went for an afternoon of fun!
I aimed for 30 joyful things this week before I turned 30 and here is what I did –
- Played arcade games – from as long as I can remember I loved going to Bridlington and playing in the arcades and going on the rides, it was the highlight of our holiday with the cousins! As I grew up it was fun to have dates racing and now taking the kids too for some cheap competitive fun and laughs.. who doesn’t like pretending they’re driving an F50!?
- The dance machine – WHAT A LAUGH we used to spend hrs on this as teenagers; one of my school friends was the bomb.com at it and I couldn’t believe the speed he would conquer it at. My cousins always loved it too when they visited and for 50p you can’t go wrong! 12yrs away from it though certainly showed with an “E” average and panting for breath!
- Went out for breakfast – Im not really a breakfast person, and Macd’s wouldn’t be my first option, but Megs and I enjoyed a bagel each and hot choc and I loved I didn’t have to make it
- Took flowers to Poppy – it might not sound very joyful but it was nice to go visit her and lay some fresh flowers, the sun was shining like the day of her funeral and I felt the warmth of love in my heart. Yes its sad, but it brought me some joy as her mother to be able to do something for. I chose the winter bouquet because it had a pine cone and I know how kids love to collect them at this time of year.
- A trip to the Museum – I took Megan and one of my nieces, with my mum to the maratime museum in Hull. I love museums and love to see and learn of the past! I would have liked to have read more but Megs and her cousin seemed to think it was a playground and legged it all over!!!
- Left the kids at my sisters – no not on purpose but I knew I needed a rest and family were willing. I felt some guilt but overall it brought me joy to lie in, only think of me for a bit and not to worry about trying to fill the day.
- A walk round Oakwell hall – The sun was shining and I had a wonderful morning walking around, chatting to a friend, definitely a place to take the kids for muddy walks and exploring!
- Lunch at Bella Italia – after our walk we enjoyed a delic meal and more chats, it was just what I needed.
- Supped a can of cold root beer – I lived in America for a while and this is one of my fave drinks…not widely available here but my lovely husband bought me a can of “A&W” and I sat in bed, in peace and savoured every mouthful
- Box Fit – always a laugh with one of my friends, burnt some calories and got rid of some anger – JOYF!
- Facial &
- Massage – these were a gift from my sister in laws for my birthday! It was SO nice to take time for me and be pampered and relieve some stress, perfect pre birthday treat
- Had my eyebrows shaped – it really is the small things, ive not had them done since the summer and boy did they need it! I feel happy now that when I look in the mirror I’m a little more feminine!
- Dyed my hair – needed doing for ages but not had the time or energy – feeling so much happier now that its done – TADA instant joy!
- Watched Les Mis – haven’t seen it for ages and loved sat uninterrupted watch a musical..and yes I sang along and best of all it was a joyful couple of hours
- Pizza hut buffet – one of my faves, carb overload and comfort food – LOVE IT!
- A trip to the temple – Im a Mormon and this is my sanctuary, it reminds me ill always be Poppys mummy and it was nice to visit with friends
- Starbucks for a hot choc – what a treat!
- Viewed a house – not because we are moving but just because it looked nice and wanted to see what was on the market! It was fun
- Spa with Nath
- Dinner out with Nath – mmmmm Nandos! Its so joyful to go for dinner and talk without kids throwing food, tugging on you and nicking ya drink!
- Check into a lush hotel – A night away in luxury – it doesn’t get more joyful than that?!Ok so not quite 30 (no surprise there) but I have accomplished more this week than I originally thought and best of all I have actually had a wonderful week and lots of fun, made possible by the wonderful friends and family I am blessed to have!
I haven’t accomplished everything I set out to do before turning 30 but I have done a lot and I have enjoyed my life so far; I have a brilliant husband of 5 years, mother to 3 children, I have traveled a bit, lived in another country, being on all sorts of adventures and met lots of amazing people, learnt a lot and taken a bunch of random courses, some complete some not, but life is for living and though things don’t go to plan we can still find joy in it. The path we set out on may not be the one we end up on but thats not always a bad thing, it can be sad and it can knock us for a long time but as I approach the next chapter I choose to not focus on what I didn’t do or mistakes I made and not feel like a failure for not reaching goals I set out to do. How can I be disappointed with where I am at when I have had so many great times, have so many wonderful blessings and learnt so much over the last 30 years? Yes my baby died and turned my life upside down, I dont know when I will feel a relief from this grief, its certainly not where I imagined I would be at 30, but this week has shown me the sunshine through the clouds and that the only goal I want have for now is to do things that bring or will lead to JOY , with this I am attracted to the idea of being a little more spontaneous, enjoying today and making the most of it… as I turn 30 tomorrow I am looking forward to what adventures are created in my future.
Try it, live a little more for today and making the best of it!