The Ordinary Moments 2016 #33 – Noticing the bonds of Siblings

I think life has easily slipped into Ordinary this week with school runs, housework and baby routines being at the top of my agenda instead of days out, adventures and free living. I feel proud of myself that despite the occasional rough night with Alice and having an extra person in the mix now, we made it on time every day and both Ethan and Megan have thoroughly enjoyed being back at school. I have missed them and its easily taken a couple of days to adjust to the silence and slower pace of life at home but the number one positive of School for me is that as their mother I have loved to see their relationship take on a new dimension now Megan has joined E at school.

Of course I worried about this step; sending your kids to school holds so many worries and general missing their little presence in everyday life at home with you, and I have certainly felt all of that because it is what I have become accustomed to. But something changed and worry left me when I noticed how Ethan was helping her with this step, and that she was paying more attention to him than me about it all…
It began the day before when I would tell her things to prepare her for the day ahead and he would jump in with “Yes I did that too Megan and its not scary” or after her pre-School boosters (yes the day before #lastminute haha) I had to laugh when I heard from the back of the car “Did it hurt Megan? You were brave because they did that needle in my arm too before I went to school… you just get it I think”! And then when the morning came he was ready by 7am and wandering around with arms behind his back instructing her on what was to come and telling her she better start getting ready!! But I was most aware of something special between them when as we left to walk up to school he held her hand and promised her that he would look after her and show her the way.

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It touched my heart to almost bursting and all worry left me to see the kids that so easily wind me up and can at times be rude or mean to one another, that I say never listen, in a moment that mattered demonstrated such love and kindness. I saw so plainly that by having them close, being at home with them over the last few years and making it through those hard days was all paying off… they have in each other a friend for life and Ethan desires to look out for his sister, what more could I want? It was a moment of pride that they do listen and watch what we teach them and it was on the important things. The things that will make them good people in life and society. Following behind and seeing the bond they had, love and awareness of each other made me realise this relationship is something I am only a spectator of and I am more than happy with that because it is all I hoped to see in my kids. In fact my little 4 & 5 year olds in their crisp new uniforms, hand in hand and not ashamed of it, ignited strong hope that these characteristics will be in them forever, that they will always be aware of others, especially each other. That this relationship is strong because they want it to be, they adore each other, love playing and being together and can now after school separating them for a year, can continue to grow it and experience new adventures, make new memories and have their own little secrets independent of me.

Each morning they walk together planning the games they will play and each afternoon they tell me all about it. They tell me that they waved across the dinner hall to one another and love to see each other and say Hi at lunch. They tell me how much fun they have each playtime playing games and making mutual friends and chat about the same people and teachers. I am grateful that this is their early school experience and that they can share it with each other.

Whilst I miss their little faces, our chats and daily adventures, how could I not be grateful for this new angle and bond to their relationship…the mornings sat watching a bit of TV and planning together, followed by the excitement to get ready in the same uniforms and then the glee on their faces to see their friends and play together. The eagerness to tell me how happy they were to see each other and how much fun one another brings into their lives. Their is nothing like a sibling bond and I am glad they have a strong and happy one. I know that there will still many a fall out and trying days ahead but I do so much look forward to seeing how it will grow and how it will develop with Alice too, because in 4 years the 3 of them will be at the same school together for a year before Ethan moves onto high school and that suddenly seems exciting when I see how much Ethan and Megs love each other and sharing school together.

These Ordinary moments we witness make hard parenting days worth it, and whilst I am always aware of one sibling not in these memories, pictures and experiences, I hope she too is somewhere in the fabrication of life that they always feel connected to her and continue to talk about her in their games and daily experiences. Sibling bonds are wonderful to have and especially wonderful to see as a mother. I couldn’t imagine my life without them.

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Linking up with Katie @mummydaddyme for #ordinarymoments 

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4 Comments

  1. julie
    September 11, 2016 / 9:10 am

    I really enjoyed reading this post, I have two girls and a boy, they’re all well in their 20’s but I always remember when they were little my son asked his oldest sister if she loved him and she replied ‘of course I love you, you’re my brother and i’ll always love you’. apart from the odd niggle they all get on so well, when they’re together they laugh and joke all the time, over the years there has been the occasional broken heart or one of life’s disappointments but they are always there to support each other. im very proud of them and like to think a little bit of how they are is down to how I brought them up, . you are doing a great job, your children are lovely xx

  2. September 11, 2016 / 7:33 pm

    Oh they are just so sweet together, and what a lucky girl to have such a fabulous big brother looking out for her. I think we see the fights because we’re home and that’s their safe space which makes it all the lovelier to see them out and about in the big world and so supportive of each other – long may they have each other’s backs!
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  3. September 11, 2016 / 7:36 pm

    Such gorgeous photos first of all Mary, especially that first one, it made me melt a bit. How lovely for them to have each other at school now and I bet it is so special to see their bond grow and change as a result of this. Sounds like a good first week. I also bet it is lovely having one on one time with Alice too. Hope you are getting on well and that newborn amazingness/fog is starting to lift. x

  4. September 11, 2016 / 8:31 pm

    I have a boy and a girl who are 3 and 5. They fight like cat and dog but at the end of the day they are best friends and love each other to bits. I love how they look out for each other at school, it’s the sweetest x

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